Okay, usually, I am an upbeat, cheerful sort of person. Today I am just feeling sorry for myself. I decided to start S.L. Smith Photography because not doing it was WAY SCARIER than just jumping in and going for it. That is what I did...I went for it...and it feels good....but...I am totally an instant gratification sort of girl..I like vaccuuming because it is instant clean, Starbucks is instant yummy and buzz all at the same time..you get the point...when I want something, I want it fast and I want it now. That is not how opening a business works. It takes a long time and a lot of work. I love the hard work...do not love all the time. I guess I am feeling 'blah' because I am basically still in the muck of the busnissey stuff...DBA paperwork, bank accounts, accepting credit cards, taxes...blah, blah, BLAH!!!!!
Then I think of what I still need...I made the mistake of going to one of my favorite camera stores today to
fondle look at my favorite lens (Canon 50 mm 1.2). It is my dream lens...but at around $1600, this lens may have to wait awhile. I leave the store and start to think about how much better my pics would look with that lens...then I freak out wonder "Are my pics even good enough?" "Do people want to hire me?" "Are my portraits good or do people just tell me that to make me feel better"
Anyway, I 'm rambling....I think I need a glass of wine, a funny movie, and a great night of sleep. I will get up and try again tomorrow. I have a portrait session of my friend's mom and her mom...I can't wait. I keep repeating this quote in my head
“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.”
Mary Anne Radmacher
I WILL try again tomorrow!