On Carpets and Drapes

I am going to hurry up and post this before I lose my courage. I'm only doing this because I'm home with a sick kid, because Maile insisted [ ;) ] , and because it is just too darn funny not to share.  Keep in mind how embarrassing this is for me.

Recently, I went back my roots...at least it's what I think my roots are. I have had my hair dyed so many colors since high school, that I'm not positive what my real color is anymore...so I went slightly lighter than my eyebrows.

Horrible picture taken by my monitor...

So, speaking of eyebrows, you know the phrase "the carpet matches the drapes"?  Well, I might be the only adult in America that did not realize the true meaning of that.  You see, I knew 'the drapes' was your hair because of the way it drapes your face.  Well, I thought that 'the carpet' was your EYEBROWS!  It made perfect sense to me...the way they lay across your forehead like two little carpets...anyone else???? Anyone????  Yeah, I didn't think so. I'm pretty smart but sometimes I'm a little slow with the jokes.

Sooooo...all this week people have been complimenting my hair...people I know well, friends, and also people I don't know well but see regularly (the man that sells me my coffee, the mom's in the school parking lot, the cashier at HEB). Well, instead of just thanking them and leaving it at that, my standard and very casual response was "Thanks, now the carpet matches the drapes.".  All with a straight face and a sweet smile.  THE CARPET MATCHES THE DRAPES???????  I totally meant eyebrows and THEY all thought I was talking about my very personal nether regions! 

After a few strange looks, I kinda got the feeling that I was not saying what I thought I was saying.   I went home and 'googled' it.  I am still dying, laughing blushing every time I think of those poor strangers listening to me tell them about my matching parts.  If you were one of those people. I am so sorry. My mouth just does not listen to my brain when it is screaming at me to "Shut UP!!!"

Comments

[Rebekah]

That is awesome, in a completely embarrassing way.

[Lori]

Can't....stop.....laughing.....OMG doesn't begin to cover this one............HILLARIOUS!

[thillysings]

That is laugh out loud funny! I needed a good laugh after the evening I've had! :) And btw, I think your hair looks great!

[Michelle]

Hahaha, can't get up off the floor... I don't think I have laughed in days, in fact cried the last two, so thank for that...

[Jen Taylor]

oh goodness. I cracked up. Out loud. Again and again. Too much for now. HA!!

[marathonmom]

DAmmmmnnnnn girl! You need to download Urban Dictionary for iPhone ASAP!

[Chasity]

oh, girl. the tears are streaming down my face from my hysterical laughing. o.m.g!!!!! thank you for a huge laugh at your expense..and for being so brave to share that! hysterical! btw- you're hair looks amazing...and it's great that it now matches...well, everything. :)

[michel]

oh my gosh you are KIDDING ME!?!? you sweet thing. I am so glad you posted this. love the new "drapes" and the old "carpet"

[maile]

I'm so glad you posted too. And I agree with Karen, you ARE adorable. xo

[mosey]

Saw your tweet about this, and laughed just as hard this time around. (truth? I've never even heard the phrase! Shows you how sheltered I am....) And you look gorgeous.

[Mary]

I love it! And I love that you had the courage to share it! Made my day!

[Amanda]

I needed this share ;)

[Karen from Chookooloonks]

You are adorable.