Judging and labeling others...we all do it. I try not to, but I do it too. A few years ago, I decided to change my thinking and try really hard not to judge people, try not to have an immediate opinion based on a first impression. This is why:
A few years ago, it was necessary for me to be what other people call "a really bad driver". I drove well beneath the posted speed limit, I took turns really really slowly, I began stepping on my breaks hundreds of yards before the stop lights, and I accelerated very cautiously and slowly when the light turned green. People regularly honked at me, yelled profanities, and flipped me the bird. I was called names, followed, glared at, and ridiculed....but none of this really bothered me. I would just sigh and think to myself "If they only knew".
What these people did not know about this mini-van they were honking at was that it carried a very sick little guy. In the back seat of this mini-van was my little boy with a Hickman Line ( a semi-permanent I.V. into his heart and jugular) attached to a heavy bag of TPN (I.V. nutrition since he could not eat).
Had I slammed on me breaks or accelerated too quickly, the line would have been yanked from his heart or jugular. At times he was also on oxygen and I could not risk taking a turn too fast and having an oxygen tank rolling around in the back of the van.
These people honking at me had no idea what was going on in our world...they just saw a bad driver and I offended them. That is when I decided to change my thinking. When I am tempted to label someone "the mean drunk guy", the "supermom", the "lazy mom", the "workaholic", the "girlie-girl", the "shopaholic", the "neglectful mom", the "hovering mom", the "unhappy person", the "anti-social person", I think back to that time and I try to remind myself that there is a reason this person is the way they are and a reason they do the things they do. They went through something or are going through something to get to where they are.
Don't get me wrong, I still catch myself judging people, but something always happens and I get a loud and clear reminder about not judging people. It comes in the form of a memory or , more often than not, my foot in my mouth (this happens A LOT)! So today, I will once again try to remember that before I form an opinion about someone, I will think about the "how and why" of who they are.
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